Welcome, or fuck you, depending.
I'm not here to tell you how many calories you can burn roller skating, I'm here to incite and entertain.
Take me or leave me.

Thursday, June 30, 2011


I found this series of photos featuring my friend Pia Mess and I fell in love with it. I like to visualize myself winning and meditate about performing well on the track. I think this speech has become my new roller derby affirmation! Words from the speech have been added and all photos are by Joe "Rollerfan" Schwartz. (It's really hard to read the text, but it's awesome! For better quality pictures, click here).

To listen/watch to whole speech check out this youtube video!

Have you seen this?

If any of you have been wondering, the graphic below is for a promo campaign I will be running at RollerCon this year. It's funny because I have been a roller girl since 2005 and have never been to Rollercon, but in a blog last year around this time, I predicted that I might be going this year, and I am! Check out the blog I wrote last July, about derby wives and featuring my old coach Kutthroat Kandie!

And stay tuned for more info about my Rollercon promo campaign! 

Junior Derby Coach?

BLADE & QUADZILLA = Spy vs. Spy?

Do you guys all know Coach Blade? The guy Andrew Wilson's character was based on in the movie Whip It? And you all know Quadzilla right? The awesome Rat City coach? Well, don't you think it's kind of funny that one's skating history is with inline skates and his name is BLADE and the other one is a quad skater and his name is QUAD?



And it's even FUNNIER when you consider that one is black and one is white.

They're like the freaking Spy vs. Spy of the roller derby world!


Judy Arnold came into the shop on Tuesday!!! It was awesome!!! She lives in Redding, and that's a LONG way from Long Beach, so we chatted for awhile and talked about her glory days in derby. We invited her to a practice at the Queen Mary dome that night but she had to get back to family obligations. She signed some postcards for us and was kind enough to let us take a video while she practiced some old school blocking moves with me!

And here's an old video of Judy in action! Check her out on youtube for more! 

Oh and for all you who thought junior derby was a NEW thing, Judy Arnold began skating at a roller derby training school at the age of 12. Junior derby has existed from the very beginning!

Notice anything different?

Notice anything different?

In case you don't pay attention on facebook, I'm announcing my very first contest on Friday! Why this Friday? (Of course there's a significance...) This Friday is July 1st, the anniversary of my very first roller derby blog. 

...This Friday is my blog's first birthday! What better way to celebrate than to announce a contest!? To get ready I have turned my blog from blue to red and black, and posted this photo as a hint:


So be sure to check back on Friday for all the details!

Monday, June 13, 2011

Junior Derby Girl Blog

I just helped my favorite junior derby girl start her very own blog!

I set up the layout for her, and I type, but she comes up with all the ideas and the words are all her!

Her name is Killer Bee and she's 10, so it's totally age appropriate. She is the only one who adds content.

Check it out!


Belmont Hot broads Initiation June 3rd


I skated as a sub again in LBRD's third game of their second season, but this time I played with the brand new team The Belmont Hot broads! LBRD only had three teams last year, and this year added a fourth. I was stoked to be able to play with them, especially since it's Pigeon's team. In my Pigeon blog I mentioned that we played in the first two games together as subs and both times our team won. Lo and behold, we pulled out another win, 100 to 97.

I can easily say this was the most exciting game I can ever remember playing. (With the exception of course, of this debacle). Fifteen minutes before the end of the bout I remember looking around at my team and saying, "You know what, no matter who wins this was one great game. We have been neck and neck all night!" And we HAD been pretty much evenly matched, the entire night. But with like 6 minutes to spare, the Terminal Island Tootsies had gained about a 12 point lead on us. It seemed improbable we could pull a win out, but still possible. Pigeon had been jamming A LOT. Our awesome coach for the night Dangerous was calling the shots. She looked at the gals going in for the next jam and said, "okay, she's going to go around and earn 4 points right now, (indicating Slice Princess, ...I believe...) and then Pigeon is going to go and earn 4, and then Auntie, if we still have time, you will jam and get 4 points. But everyone, THEY CANNOT EARN ONE POINT IN ORDER FOR US TO PULL OFF THIS WIN!!" The pressure was fucking ON.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

My Dilemma

Yup, I just took this
I recently started working in Moxi Roller Skate shop in Long Beach. Selling skates is like delivering flowers. Almost everyone who buys a pair is celebrating something or treating themselves and you get to share in their joy and excitement.  I love sending people off with a smile on their face and skates on their feet. In the words of Estro Jen, life rolls! I had always thought I was bad at retail, and I am, when I’m selling something I don’t believe in. But roller skates are something I can get behind. It really does warm my heart when I can find the perfect skates for someone, I say, “I’m so excited for you!” And I really mean it.

My view from the Rental Shack
The cute rental skates

I also work at Moxi By the Beach on the weekends. That’s Moxi’s skate rental shack by the sea, and it really is as wondrous as it sounds. I like to wear skates to work, all day in the shop and all day at the beach. When you think about it, I’m being paid to be on skates. For years I’ve said I’d rather be rolling around than stuffed up in a stupid office or working a 9 to 5, and somehow, I’ve made it happen. A friend of mine warned me that the day would come when I’d be too tired to skate for fun, and skating would feel like a chore. I brushed the idea away and thought, “Ya, that’ll be the day.” But now, there actually HAVE been days where I have been too tired from working all day in skates to make it to roller derby practice and I have to laugh a little to myself. It’s lame to miss practice but in my mind, I’ve made it.

Friday, June 3, 2011

A Tribute to Jerry Seltzer

I’ve been meaning to write this blog for quite some time but I guess the weight of the task at hand was just too daunting. I was overwhelmed with having to convey the magnitude of such an influential figure in the sport of Roller Derby. The day really crept up on me. I’m sure now whatever I say will not do him or my feelings justice, but here I go.

Today is The Commissioner’s birthday! (Jerry Seltzer is the son of Leo Seltzer, the inventor of Roller Derby.) Jerry is not just the son of the sport’s creator. He’s not just some figurehead who shows up at bouts to accept awards and remind people of the past. He is actively involved in the sport’s growth and evolution and cares deeply about the future of the sport we now call ours. He knows about promotions and the game and safety and skaters' rights and management. He is an innovator. Some skaters may discredit him because he is old, or because he never skated, or because they think he is just a mouthpiece for the past, but he has something to say. His opinions aren’t outdated he’s just as relevant as ever.