DISCLAIMER:
Welcome, or fuck you, depending.
I'm not here to tell you how many calories you can burn roller skating, I'm here to incite and entertain.
Take me or leave me.

Friday, April 6, 2012

My Horoscope for April 6, 2012



For Libra 4.6.12.

"You may feel an urgent need to move ahead and in the process will discard work which is not functional or useful to your future directions and goals. On the other hand, this period can bring about zealous involvement with humanitarian or social organizations."




Then again, it also says my wellness is at 92% and I'm sick as a dog today. ::shrug::

"May the bridges I burn light the way..."

Friday, March 16, 2012

I'M TRYING OUT FOR A REALITY SHOW

About a month ago my roommate told me about a Reality Show that had done a casting call for roller girls. When I went to the audition I found out that they were just looking for fun and interesting people that were athletic in general. But I showed up in a roller derby shirt and really played up the fact that I was a roller girl. (Hey, they're looking to fit you into some kind of mold- a character). So I actually said 'fuck' in the interview, and when they told me to do a rendition of my victory dance I did a cartwheel in the audition room. I made it to the next round, which is a timed obstacle course! (The show is EXTREME MUSICAL CHAIRS for money), But in this obstacle course I have to swim! Yes, swim! So, this Sunday morning, I have to show up to a community college in Hollywood at 8:30 am, (it's supposed to rain!) in a SWIM SUIT and do a timed obstacle course. OMG. This is going to be weird. At this point, I'm really just doing it for the experience, but I can't believe how many people were at the first audition talking about how this is a "good experience" and a "great way to break into the biz". Fucking morons. For me, just like the Pitbull/NeYo video shoot thing, this is just a fun experience and something I wouldn't get to do if I didn't live down here in SoCal. I think that's the attitude you have to have about these things. God, I feel sorry for the people who go to music video shoots and reality show castings on a regular basis like it's their life dream.

Anyway, after the first audition and before I got invited back for this timed trial, I had to send them Action Shots of me and some pictures of my "supporter". I had to pick a "supporter" who would be a good cheerleader for me and be available during the shoot dates to be on the show with me. Naturally, I picked my roommate Estro Jen. Anyway, here are the photos I submitted. I'll keep you updated after I attend the obstacle course this weekend. Wish me luck!

XoXo,
Auntie


CLICK READ MORE TO SEE THE PHOTOS I SUBMITTED TO BE ON THE TV SHOW!

Free Promotional Stuff available to YOU

I am bringing a shit ton of promotional stuff to Rollercon 2012. I am not sure yet how I intend to pass it out, but it will be free to my fans. I don't know if I'm going to do trivia or golden tickets, or a scavenger hunt or geocaching or what, but I will come up with something. Anyway, here's a sneak peak at what you can get!

Matches and Rolling Papers!!!

The matches say "For All You Party Poopers" and there is an assortment of rolling papers that say "Roll Up & Roll Out!", "Fuck Bein' Cool, Just Have Fun" and "Roll a Doobie for Roller Derby!". And yea I ordered blank white ones and just fuckin' wrote on them with a sharpie. Guerilla marketing bitches!

              Next up? Awesome sauce.  ...I mean socks.          
  

                                                                       Shoe Laces Galore!   
 


Whistles! (Did you think I'd forget you referees?)
Weird Buttons and Keychains!

"Roller Derby causes women to Kill their husbands, Abandon children, worship Satan and become Lesbians."

"Fuck Bein' Cool Just Have Fun"

"Hellarad Hates Mes"

"See Something, Skate Something"










Of course there will be lots of stickers!
















And lastly, there will be a second issue of my mini mag, and like last time, there will be a limited number available, so keep your eyes peeled if you want one!

xoxo,
Hugs N Shoves,
(btw, Ten Gauge Rachel Rage fucking stole that from ME).

Auntie Social.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

MY OWN CHALLENGE

MY OWN CHALLENGE...


I'm Back! -Gave up Facebook for Lent and Picked up Blogging again...

Curious what's stuck in my head lately?

I LOVE THIS BETCH!!!



She's wearing Minnie Mouse ears and she's from the Bay, Bitch!

"Gucci, Gucci, Louie, Louie, Fendi, Fendi, Prada. Basic bitches wear that shit so I don't even bother!"

And I love the kitty litter rhyme.